I just ran into yet another law that completely misses the point. Apparently an Illinois man won a suit against a man whom he accused of stealing his wife’s affections:
Arthur Friedman used a little-known state law to mount the legal attack against Blinov. The alienation of affection law, one of eight across the country, lets spouses seek damages for the loss of love. – [Yahoo/AP]
OK, this just seems wrong to me on a myriad of levels. First of all, how is it possible to legally “steal” someones affections? And how exactly does the “thief” become liable? I understand the concept of one man stealing another mans wife in an emotional context, but as a suable offense it doesn’t seem right. To start of with, legally, a marriage is a contract between a man and his wife, not a third party. If she cheats on you with a third party, she has broken the contract, not the third party.
It seems to me that as a husband, it would simply be petty to blame a third party for your wife leaving you. It’s not like women are brainless creatures that must be protected from the advances of others because they have no will of their own. She was fully aware of what she was doing, and she knowingly decided to break her vows, not the guy who pursued her, even if he is a real jerk for doing so. If anything, the wife should have been sued. If not for the fact that I have seen even stupider laws on the books, It would amaze me that such a law existed. I’m no legal or social science genius but my guess would be that this law was written in considerably more chauvinistic times.
But even more silly than that ridiculous law, is the fact that, if my understanding of the article is correct, this was apparently a “swinging” couple, and (if we are to believe the testimony of a cheatin’ wife) it sounds as if it was Mr. Friedman who persuaded Mrs. Friedman to start “swinging” as a means to spice up their sex life! Honestly, none of this makes sense to me. First, If a couple is having marital problems, their first solution should be to TALK, openly and honestly to EACH OTHER about them! Maybe get counseling. Sleeping with third parties, while it may sound like a good idea to some, is rarely a good solution, as this couple found out!!
Now I’d be the last person to judge anothers life style. I’m sure many couples find that swinging spices up their sex life. I’ve actually even read of cases where it made the marriage stronger. But regardless of what activities a married couple engages in, I am fairly certain that they worked best when these couples were in a secure, honest and open marriage to begin with, and they came to the decision to do these activities TOGETHER. This couple apparently did the opposite. And then started pointing fingers and blaming others for the result. Typical.
[In my best "Bernie Mac" impression]
Listen up America! You need to start taking responsibility for your actions! Stop abusing and hiding behind all these stupid laws and deal with each other like real, honest, thinking, feeling human beings!! Stop being greedy and selfish and petty, and maybe you won’t have so many problems to begin with!! Aaaiight! I’m out! Peace Out America!
Illinois man files suit over lost love – [Yahoo/AP]